How do you start talking about your mental health? In this guest essay in the CATCH journal, Haley Epstein, 2018 Deerfield High School grad, offers advice on engaging in an open conversation and why it is critical for everyone.
It’s okay to not be okay. I know it sounds silly to say, but a lot of us tend to forget that it IS okay to not be okay sometimes. With all the pressures and expectations throughout our society, it can be very easy to get wrapped up in trying to be the happiest, most productive, “best” versions of ourselves all the time. But you and I both know that’s an impossible task to conquer.
I talk to people each and every day about mental health and the stigma we see held so strongly surrounding it. We are consistently trying to break down those barriers and find ways to normalize the conversation. However, the number one question I get asked is always “Where do I start?” Getting started by, not only taking care of your own mental health, but, by beginning the conversation surrounding mental health can be scary. It can be intimidating. And it can oftentimes overwhelm us to a degree we never thought imaginable. AND, it is not impossible to do.
So, start the conversation. Next time someone asks you how your day was, don’t just say “goodhowareyou”. Take a minute, check in with yourself, and tell them about the exam that just kicked your ass, or how you’ve been feeling anxious for the past week about a fight you got into with your mom.
Talking about the things that make us feel anything other than “okay” is how we begin normalizing a conversation surrounding mental health as a whole. It doesn’t happen overnight, but the more and more we become comfortable with being uncomfortable and having these conversations, the more and more we’re not only changing the world, but saving lives every day.
Each and every human on this planet has anxiety. Each and every human on this planet is impacted by mental health. Each and every human on this planet has felt what you are feeling in the moments when you feel the most alone. I promise you. However, no one would know this because we never talk about it. It’s not who you least expect. It’s the girl that sits behind you in math class, it’s the guy you pass every day on campus, it’s your brother, your sister, your best friend, the person sitting next to you right now.
Starting the conversation and reaching out for help are the most important things you can do to make change. If you’re reading this and are feeling scared, or nervous to ask for help, know that you are not alone. Know that there are so many humans who feel the exact same way as you, and know that there are so many ways to get the help you need.
I see you, I am here for you, and remember it’s okay to not be okay sometimes.
Haley Epstein is a 2018 Deerfield High School graduate and a senior at Northeastern Illinois University. She is on a mission to normalize the conversation about mental health and let everyone know it’s #itsokaytonotbeokay.
